Who are you? You might have asked yourself the question, ‘who am I’? The answer is that our nature is not set in concrete. If we identify with ‘I am an accountant’, what happens when we get laid off, quit or retire and don’t have that job anymore?
Who do we become then? Possibly very depressed, maybe losing our sense of self-worth along with our purpose or mission in life. Maybe, it would be better to say to yourself ‘I work as an accountant’?
We tend to attach our identity to our jobs, a political party, being a home maker, student or whatever. In truth, we are none of these. The flow of life always seems to change, and maybe being in the present moment or process of living is what we should immerse our awareness in disconnecting ourselves from these ‘false’ identities. Yet, if we do so, what will we lose and what will be left of us? We will still survive and be here like always.
We all get attached to our beliefs and allow them to define who we are. Beliefs can limit our growth keeping us in a tidy little box so we never have to change or consider new ideas. And, if we think we know ourselves all too well, this may not be as true as we think when we are forced by life’s circumstances to take a much closer look inside.
What is the old saying ‘the unexamined life is not worth living’? Seeking a deeper understanding of self is a worthy idea, especially observing and taking note of our thoughts and how we feel during each day. It is worthy to ‘know thyself’. If one seeks this, self knowledge unfolds throughout ones life.
We are as much a part of the universe as anything is. Being skeptical yet having an open mind is useful. It may be time to discard old beliefs because when we reality test them, they no longer serve us well or are useful. For example, ‘I will never be successful’ could be changed to ‘I think I have become successful. I guess I must have been mistaken’.
We are not our clothes, the car we drive, the neighborhood we live in, how others perceive us, our professions, our behavior or circumstances. These limit us. And, when what we have identified ourselves with is not in our lives anymore, we can feel lost possibly devastated.
The language we use when we talk to ourselves is important. For example, it might be better rephrasing our self talk from ‘I’m tired of never having any money’ to ‘I’d like to have more money’. A positive twist makes things seem better.
So, who are we? We are conscious in this body. But, the body does not live forever. When one loses a tooth, he is separated from that tooth. In other words, we may lose an appendix, a leg, an arm and we are still us. We have no more relation to the part that is missing. What this means is that who we are is ‘consciousness’ which doesn’t actually reside within this body of ours.
If I feel lost, how do I find myself? Living and learning takes a lifetime. We never know everything about ourselves and life. We can meditate. We can pray. We can take action on those things when action is required. Sometimes, inaction works best; observing what’s going on is the best option.
All I can say is it’s best to be honest with everyone if you can, especially ourselves. Be yourself, whoever that self is. Sometimes, you can’t be honest and be yourself. It depends upon the life circumstances or situation. It may be cultural or societal in nature. I wouldn’t be honest with someone who intends on doing you harm. This person, you must deceive, defend yourself and get away from.
We all can change if we want to. But, change is best done inward at the ‘being’ level, not superficially on the outside like buying a new car, new clothes or the latest hairdo. This is not real change. They may make you happy for a while, but it’s not permanent.
You have to let go of yourself to find yourself. No one can control others. You are what you are, nothing more, nothing less. But, we can control our actions and what we believe and think. To a certain degree, we can control our emotions. But, we feel the way we feel.
Emotions are there to guide us. Emotions aren’t necessarily good or bad. We can’t live a lie and most important of all, lying to yourself never pays. Listen to your gut. Let your intuition guide you, yet at the same time, think logically and reason things out fully before you make a move. Don’t be in denial about what stands before your wide open eyes.